TAREQ EQTEDARY WAS BORN IN MAZAR-E-SHARIF, IN AFGHANISTAN’S NORTHERN BALKH PROVINCE, a region layered with history, poetry, trade routes, and centuries of civilizations, the same place where Rumi was born 800 years ago. But Tareq’s life began with tragedy.

“My first breath was my mother’s last breath,” he says quietly. “She had already lost two babies before me. So my existence came at the cost of losing her.” 

He was raised by his grandmother and guided by his grandfather, who was deeply committed to education and culture. Their home was not so wealthy, but it was rich in values, spirituality, learning, respect, community, and responsibility. His grandfather had a profound impact and inspired him.  

Tareq showed signs of independence and initiative. When he was 11 or 12, Tareq set up a small table in front of the school, selling pens, pencils, notebooks, and erasers to younger students. Later, he ran a bookstore where he was not just selling books but also renting books out like a library, because people couldn’t afford to buy books; moreover, they didn't have access to resources. 

“I didn’t know the word entrepreneur,” he laughs. “I just knew people needed access to education and learning through available resources like sharing books.”

“I still remember my favorite memories from moments of innocence, playing kids' games with childhood friends, visiting the Selo factory and local bazaars with my father, and gathering with family in the evenings to eat food and listen to elders’ stories. I remember Nowruz- New Year celebrations, as a season of renewal, participating in New Year festivals around the city, eating haftmewa, flying kites, and running on rooftops. I remember those days when I was with my childhood friends, going to primary school and leading the class as the selected class representative. Those were moments when life felt light and full of Assibility”.

Tareq had memories from his earlier childhood, he continued “I also remember earlier childhood, the time when there were internal wars among parties, and we were underground several days with less food and water, and after the war ended, our house and our neighbor's house were riddled by party militia”.  

Before 2001, life was simple but fragile. Communities focused on survival, there were tradition education through Madrasa, which focused on learning the Qur'an and Islamic principles. There were no basic rights; people were living back in the 14th century and under the cruelty and pressure of the first Taliban. That time was counted as the dark era of the Taliban.  But still, “We had dreams for a peaceful and free Afghanistan and a better future for children and youth,” He says.

“I remembered the days at noon time, a man with a black turban and long beard and with whips on his right hand and forcing people to pray,” screamed with anger and violence by beating, on the other hand, I had seen hands cut off and hanged in the trees in four ways of the city. They said this is the hand of a thief. We cut his hand because he shouldn't and is not able to steal in the future. They stated we are implementing Islamic roles and laws. 

“Before going forward, let me tell you and the readers, I can't say or write my entire life stories and being as witness to wars, conflict, and violence since I was born and recent years in short periods of time, I can only share some moments of my life as per my personal perspective and being witness and suffring from those moments and time. Now I see it as a whole life experience full of risk and possibilities in a war-torn country like Afghanistan”, I think I should write my life story book, he laughed. Who knows? I may write it, and it may happen, as the story has already happened in reality, and life is happening now and ahead. 

After 9/11 in late 2001, during his high school years, the war began. 

“There was chaos in the city; everyone was running towards their homes, so scaredly, while running home, the firing was ongoing. I saw women and children running away in fear and panic to reach their homes or a safe place. After we reached home, I remembered we spent weeks hiding underground. Food, electricity, and basic needs became uncertain. We were hearing the firing very nearly. No one was allowed to get out. Rockets hit homes near us.”

When the American aircraft arrived, and the bombardment began, the Taliban were using the underground of Sultan Razia High School, a girls' school in Mazar-e-Sharif, as their military base, with over 400 fighters inside and equipped with heavy weapons and rockets. The school was right behind the Mazar municipality, a mile away from Tareq’s house.

When the fighting paused, he came up and saw dead bodies lying all around the streets, and everywhere there were signs of war. "There was a pile of hundreds of dead human beings on a small hill behind Mazar city municipality," he says. The Red Cross was removing them. There were military convoys on the roads, and new security structures in the cities. The only media were the BBC and VOA Radio, which were broadcasting the war situation and the arrivals. It felt like the beginning of a new phase for the city and country. 

Yet when the Taliban fell, a new government began forming by a group of politicians led by Hamid Karzai after the Bonn conference decision in 2001. Later, the international communities arrived for security support and rebuilding and reconstruction of Afghanistan, and supporting their government and the nation's journey. After years of darkness under the Taliban regime, he believed the arrival of international forces might bring stability, education, peace, and opportunity. It felt like a chance to rebuild the country and reclaim the future they were denied. 

He wasn't mature enough to understand the politics in theory or in practice, but he saw the changes happen with his own eyes. When the new transitional government came, there was hope. Real hope. The image of the city changed and moved towards development and reconstruction. The transitional government was established, and the constitution of Afghanistan was written and approved by the nation. 

After a year or so, he finished high school, and right after, he made a decision: I'm going to Kabul, the capital.

His father tried to stop him: "Who will be with you? You don’t know anyone there, you're just a young boy," but Tareq felt something pulling him forward.

"There was a call inside me," he says. "Something was waiting for me there."

His father couldn’t stop him. Finally, he gave him his blessing: "All my prayers, all my support are with you. Go ahead, I believe you, and good luck."

When he arrived in Kabul, everything opened up. Within a year, he was working with an airline company, later with Afghanistan international bank, but he kept thinking: why am I sitting on a chair behind a desk and calculating figures when I could be working with society?

He changed his profession entirely. He started working with the Norwegian Refugee Council, supporting refugees and displaced people. In addition, he engaged with communities and youth groups and started volunteer activities. At the same time, he was doing his bachelor's degree, 

"When I remember those times now, I think: how was it possible that I was able to do all of that, working, education, volunteering, and social activities? But I did it."

Later, he joined the Young Leaders Forum YLF, a platform for supporting young leaders by FES, a German foundation, he start working with the National Democratic Institute for International Affairs (NDI).  

During this time period, through his work in civil society, fighting against corruption, advocating for human rights, and youth education, participation, and leadership, in 2012, he was selected and supported to represent Afghanistan's youth in the NATO Chicago Summit in Chicago, Illinois, USA. “I was the voice of Afghan youth in the summit, and while I was planning to fly back to my country, a good friend of mine asked me and tried to convince me to stay and start a new life in the US, but I said no, I will go back, and I have a lot to do there. I wanted to be part of the change, and I have a responsibility.  I returned”. 

In 2013, he represented the Afghan civil society and youth in the World Justice Forum in the Huge the Netherland, later in 2014, he represented the young leaders of Afghanistan and delivered a speech in main stage of the One Young World summit in Dublin, Ireland. He traveled to many countries for cultural exchange, talking about Afghanistan and presenting the Afghan youth and civil society in Afghanistan. 

He became Outreach Advisor for a USAID project called ALBA in the Afghanistan Parliament and worked for four years with Parliament members for their interaction with local government, civil society, women, and media organizations, and led their communication and outreach events. 

He founded The Generation Positive Organization (G+) in 2015, with the vision to create a new identity for the new generation and the new Afghanistan, a platform where young people could find their voices, build communities even in the middle of conflict spaces, where Afghan youth could be leaders, not just victims of war. “We were confident in empowering and supporting youths and nurturing a new identity for Afghanistan that embodies volunteerism, peace, quality education, human rights, democracy, gender equality, in addition to cultivating positivity among youths and creating a positive society”. This ongoing commitment and sense of purpose eventually led Tareq to be one of the youngest independent candidates to run in Afghanistan’s parliamentary election in 2018. 

“Among all, during this time I saw many explosions, suicide bombs happened in streets, in schools, in university, in hospital, in mosques, even on my way to office, in most of them I was a second or a block away, luckily I survived but saw many innocent people have been killed. When I was working with USAID, I remembered the day that I was in the office in the third flour right in front of Afghanistan paliment, a huge explosion happened, all the glasses, windows and doors fallen, I and my colleagues get under the table, and then went to the safe room while gun firing started and many people were killed on that day.” 

It was late 2020. While the Taliban are gaining more power and are going forward politically, they opened an office in Qatar, and a peace negotiation agenda came up. Later the Taliban were getting control of the south and west provinces of Afghanistan, insecurities where more visible than ever before, most of the American and international troops where already withdrawn and ended their operation. Everywhere, people were talking over the fall of Afghanistan in to hand of the Taliban, but still the government, institutions, and organizations were operating and pretending that everything was under control. People were living between hope and danger, and uncertainty at the same time. 

Then, on August 15, 2021, while Tareq was delivering a training session for civil society activists in Kabul Shar-e-naw, he received a call from the office: "Dismiss everything. Get home immediately."

“When I was on the way back home through the streets, I watched the city unraveling, there chaos, traffic jam, people were running, crying, calling family, searching for escape, going toward the airport. I got home after 4 hours, and I was shocked. I turned on the tv, and all the channels were talking about the fall of Kabul. I couldn’t imagine the fall of Afghanistan in one day and seeing by my own eyes. That night, The Aljazera tv had reported and shown a group of Taliban that got into the presidential palace; it was clear that the president and all authorities had fled.” 

"It wasn't just the fall of a government," Tareq says quietly. "It was the fall of a nation. It was the fall of everything." Everything we had built in 20 years, all achievements felt and collapsed in front of us in a night.”

“I was shocked and captured by trauma and didn’t sleep for days and nights, and I couldn’t imagine that I was watching the fall of my country into the hands of the Taliban again, and they came back after 20 years”. 

Every moment felt like a decision between life and death. During the evacuation operation, when he finally went to the airport, it was chaos, with thousands of desperate people. He also saw strangers helping strangers, people sharing water, lifting children above crowds. American troops were asking for permits and documents and directing people to the airport for evacuations. 

“I was there a block away while a huge explosion had happened right in front of the airport entrance, I survived but many people where killed among American troops. That time I changed my mind to go back home instead of risking my life for evacuation, I thought that in any case I should stay for a while, then find a way to escape from the country”. 

The main evacuation operation ended in August 31, Taliban has controlled all over the country.  “I couldn’t find another chance to be part of evacuations. Hence, I stayed home, hidden. I didn’t appear in public for a year.” 

The Taliban started searching and arresting those who are government officials and worked for Americans, and those who are against their ideology and have modern thoughts. Tareq was not separate from their target people, as he was working with USAID, he was a human rights activist, lending a country-wide organization a public face, and, of course, he was against Taliban ideology. He was the exact sort of person that the Taliban hate and look for. 

“Leaving was not my choice, but survival and the only way to protect my life and preserve even a small chance for a future. I spent over a year of my life living secretly in Mazar and Kabul with a long beard after the fall of Afghanistan.”

Finally, in Dec 2022, through a friend of a friend, he found a chance of leaving his home land to Pakistan, Islamabad. With the support of international human rights organizations, he got the chance to move to Germany, where he spent a year dealing with trauma, depression, anxiety, and loss. Finally, in December 2023, he secured a U.S. visa and flew to California. He arrived in the US with almost nothing, but a passport, a backpack, and zero balance.  

With all those feelings and trauma experiences he brought from his country and Germany, he started from zero and started a new life.

“Although it was so hard to forget or leave behind everything and start completely from scratch, I decided to start a new chapter of my life and dream for a better future here in the US,” he says. 

He focused on his mental health, healing process, started working out, and improving language, joined community programs, engaged with neighbors, integrating with American culture and society, knowing roles and laws, and understanding the system, and more.

"Every small step is helping me rebuild a new version of myself."

And the Generation Positive is still alive. He's still doing the work, just in a different way and a different place and with a global vision now.

"After years of war and noise and stress, the peacefulness felt strange."

"What people need to understand is that refugees don't come empty-handed; we carry pain, loss, and trauma, yes. But we also carry resilience, skills, experience, and dreams. We lost everything, but we haven't lost our humanity or our desire to contribute."  When you welcome a refugee, you are welcoming someone determined to rebuild and give back.

If he could speak to an American veteran who served in Afghanistan, he would thank them for the times they protected civilians and believed in the Afghan youth. He would tell them that while they experienced Afghanistan through deployments, Afghans lived the war continuously, without breaks.

"We were fighting in our own way—for education, freedom, dignity, a peaceful future."

And he would ask them: How has Afghanistan stayed with you? What memories do you still carry? What about the humanity, the people, culture, and history of Afghanistan? 

"Because this project isn't just about shared war," he says. "It's about shared humanity."